Mahatma Gandhi said, Be the change you want to see.” I’m following that advice and working at it pretty relentlessly. I have a passion for personal growth, and it all starts with me.
The reality is I have crawled through the trenches. Climbed the mountains and done the same inner work that I am asking you to do.
The thing is though, I really do want to change the world! But I am realistic and practical, so I know I can’t do it all by myself. That is why I am so passionate about what I do. I love helping to facilitate change in others. My belief is that with every one of us who remembers how powerful, loving and deserving we are, that has a ripple effect. That is why, through my one on one and group coaching I give 100% of myself to you.
I do this by giving you the tools and motivation to become your real, authentic self. To help you claim and take ownership of the life you deserve so that you will fulfill your life purpose and create a life by design.
I am a life purpose coach and motivational speaker who speaks, acts, and works from my life experience. I call my life experience my “on the job training” because it endowed me with the understandings and tools to do what I feel called to do — help individuals discover their life purpose and rediscover their love for life.
There is nothing I love more than empowering people to create a more positive, healthy life. That is because I’ve been deep in life’s trenches. I was born to a teen mom who was in a home for unwed mothers, I spent my first 9 years in very difficult foster care situations where I experienced every form of abuse possible, you name it I experienced it. I was eventually adopted at the age of nine by a single white homosexual man. He was a very loving man, but I was full of hate. I didn’t hate other people I hated myself. By age 14 I was in and out of drug treatment facilities. By my thirties I was totally without hope. I had survived a horrific cocaine and alcohol problem, lived for years in hotels and on random couches and even got to the point of eating out of a garbage can. I have been there.
One night I had what I can only describe as an epiphany. I absolutely knew that I had to change, and for the very first time in my life I accepted that I didn’t know what to do. I did something that completely surprised me — I asked God for help.
This snippet from The Words Over Ice Show describes that night:
In the days to come, people entered my life one after another and gave me the guidance I needed. One of these was a Buddhist sensei who offered me new orientations and ways of thinking. Many of his ideas resonated with me so strongly that I began to look at my life with new eyes and see that many of my most fundamental beliefs were wrong. I was even able to accept his insistence that I was the problem—not my birth mother, not my biological father, not my dad, and not the wealthy kids who bullied me when I moved to the suburbs. Once I began to accept that I was the problem, I was ready for the most freeing realization of all: I was also the solution. He planted the seeds that would ultimately help me to realize that I was not a victim of outside circumstances, in fact, I later realized my belief system created the circumstances.
Once I began to accept that I was the problem, I was ready for the most freeing realization of all: I was also the solution.
Get this — the problem is not “out there” somehow, it is not with our circumstance — and neither is the solution! We are the problem, and we are also the solution. Understanding and accepting that gave me — for the first time in my life — the hope that despite all the darkness in my life there was a light at the end of my tunnel – yes, my own personal sunlight.
I experienced this understanding as “the medicine of equal or greater value.” You see, I had used substances as medicine to hide the pain I felt. The solution I found was one of a spiritual nature, and it exceeded anything I had ever experienced. You can hear more about this in this snippet from The Words Over Ice Show:
So, I began my journey back to myself, back to that innocent child-like nature that feels like me. I started to change when I realized that many of my negative situations were the result of my negative behavior, behavior that had stemmed from my negative mindset. I had established my mindset as a way of coping with life, but it no longer had a place in my life. I realized that my mindset was the problem.
As I started to take responsibility for my behaviors and attitude, I began the difficult process of reconstructing my mindset. The newfound positive mindset I created very naturally helped me start doing some positive things. I started exercising, eating healthy, and dealing with my past and my feelings.
It was at this point – as I started changing and actually becoming the change – that I began to realize that I was created perfectly. I realized that not only do I have purpose, but I also have the talents I need to fulfill my purpose. I was joyous! Best of all, by helping myself, I was putting myself in a position to finally begin to answer the calling I had felt since I was young, my desire to help others live their best life.
I am on that journey – I am truly still making it. That is why I can guide you to do the same. I offer you my guidance in a number of ways — through personal coaching, life purpose workshops, or speaking engagements. I’ve gone deep into this territory with myself and hundreds of individuals. I can help you find the happiness that comes with knowing yourself – yes, your own personal sunlight.
Together we can help you realize what your authentic, loving, life looks like and create the design to achieve it.
